Compassion fatigue
You open the news in the morning. You see another story about a loss, shelling, a missing person, or someone's plea for help.
At first, you want to support, spread the word, help, write a few words, but over time, a different feeling may appear: you can no longer react to new stories in the same way. You don't have the strength to empathize. You just want to close the feed.
This doesn't mean you've become indifferent.
Sometimes it means you're tired.
When compassion is also exhausting
You can feel strong emotions not only because of what is happening directly to you. Constant contact with other people's pain also requires internal resources.
Especially in conditions of prolonged stress, when difficult news is not an isolated event, but becomes part of everyday life.
You can read other people's stories, think about what you could do for them. If there are many such stories and they come every day, the psyche can gradually become overloaded.
Then appear:
emotional exhaustion;
irritability or apathy;
feeling of powerlessness;
difficulty focusing on one's own life;
a desire to avoid news and conversations about difficult topics;
the feeling that "I can't feel anything anymore."
The latter can be the most frightening, because the thought arises: "If I don't react the way I used to, maybe I've become indifferent?"
Compassion fatigue is not a lack of empathy
The capacity for empathy is not unlimited. A person cannot be constantly in contact with another person's pain and remain completely unchanged.
Sometimes distancing yourself from difficult content is not indifference, but a way for the psyche to reduce the load.
You don't need to read all the stories to remain a caring person.
Information boundaries are also about taking care of yourself
You can set a time when you check the information instead of doing it every few minutes.
You can not open a video or post if you do not have the resources to see it right now.
You can tell your loved ones: "I'm not ready to discuss this right now."
This doesn't mean ignoring reality. It means choosing a way to engage with it that doesn't destroy you.
"What if I miss something important?"
The constant updating of your feed often creates the illusion that you have to be up to date with everything. As if if you step away from the news for even a few hours, you lose control.
However, the amount of information you consume does not equal the amount of control you have.
Sometimes, constantly reading the news only increases anxiety, preventing you from changing anything.
Therefore, you can ask yourself:
Does this information give me the opportunity to do something—or does it just make me worry?
If you can help, donate, spread important information, or support someone, please do so.
And then allow yourself to return to your own life.
Eat. Sleep. Take a walk. Talk to a loved one. Watch a TV series. Read a book. Laugh.
These ordinary things don't become less important just because there's a lot of pain going on around them.
You can't be a resource for everyone if you don't have any left for yourself.
Sometimes it seems like rest is something you can afford after everything important is done.
However, in conditions of constant stress, the list of "important" may never end.
Therefore, recovery does not necessarily have to be a reward for performance.
You don't have to wait until you're completely exhausted to take a break.
You can sympathize with others and at the same time not read another difficult story.
You can help and not answer all the questions.
You can remain a caring person and choose silence from time to time.
Taking care of yourself doesn't diminish your ability to empathize with others. On the contrary, being able to recover helps you support others when they really need it.
If you have been a victim of domestic violence or gender discrimination, please contact the National Hotline for Prevention of Domestic Violence, Human Trafficking and Gender Discrimination for advice and assistance:
📱116 123
☎ 0 800 500 335
This article was made possible by the support of the Norwegian people through the Ministry of Foreign Affairs of Norway (MFA of Norway) within the framework of the project “Building a Gender-Inclusive Recovery with the Women’s Movement of Ukraine” (GEN-Recovery). Responsibility for the content of the information lies with the NGO “La Strada-Ukraine”. The information presented in this article does not necessarily reflect the views of the Ministry of Foreign Affairs of Norway or the Government of Norway.
Українська